As long-distance grandparents, we look forward to precious video chats with our grandkids.  In fact, we’d probably be thrilled to Facetime almost daily! But each video chat needs parents’ help to set things up.  These days, parent(s) are strapped for time and juggling more roles then ever.  So how can we connect with our grandkids, when their parents have such challenging schedules?  For one thing, we can try reaching out to our grandkids’ parents and start a conversation.

But before you call, think about how hard it was to raise kids. We know how demanding it can be. When parents talk, try to listen. Really listen. How could we ever have imagined what parenting would be like for them now?

Parents could really use our support. Wouldn’t it be great if our video chats helped them and connected us with our grandkids at the same time? By learning their needs, we could do both!

REACHING OUT TO PARENTS: IDEAS TO CONSIDER

• Whether you’re a new long-distance grandparent or you’ve been at this for a while, talking with parents about their needs can still be helpful.
• Before you begin, think about your own availability.
• When you plan family conversations or video visits, ask parents for the best times.
• Discuss activities parents feel would be most helpful. For example, would they prefer story time at night or homework help in the afternoon?  If you have some ideas you’ve thought of, share them, too. Sometimes parents really appreciate not having to think of one more thing.  It can be a big relief! (We can help you with that one!)
• While planning, try to set up some sort of a feedback loop. It could be something as simple as a text or a monthly call. Talk about how the video chats are going. If there’s any problems, you can address them.
• But no matter what the plans are, be flexible! We all know that especially with kids, stuff happens.

Arrangements will be different for each family. Over time, plans will probably change. Through it all, though, you’re building a strong foundation for the future.  And maybe your grandkids’ parents can get a bit of a well-deserved breather at the same time!